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hey! i made it to a second volume of my reality bites series! that means it officially needs to continue.

AUSTRALIAN IDOL
imagine this: you’re late in the season of american idol. it’s down to the top five. contestants have been singing and pleading their way through audition after audition, round after round, theme night after theme night. they’ve smiled and nodded as randy jackson and kara dioguardi said nothing worthwhile. they’ve stared into space and wondered what the hell paula abdul was on as she attempted to form a complete sentence. they cringed as simon cowell ripped them a new asshole from time to time. and now that they’re on to the top 5 they just decide to stand up and… quit. that’s right. quit. not only quit, but go back to their job as a school teacher. what would you do? what would ryan secreast even say? well… that’s what toby moulton did on australian idol. he decided after all the effort, he just didn’t want to be a singer. and before competition began on top 5 night, he walked out. watch the touching video here. and just try and tell me you don’t have a little crush on toby moulton…

TOP CHEF: MASTERS 2
yey! bravo made the right choice by bringing back the entertaining and addictive top chef: masters for a second season. gael freene, james oseland, and jay rayner will return as judges, as will host kelly choi. expect the series to air in summer 2010. anyone else excited about this?

TOP CHEF: JUST DESSERTS
as if the top chef franchise couldn’t get any better, bravo is planning for a top chef: just desserts. magical elves will produce. it’ll just be pastry chefs the whole time, presumably following the same format as the main show. i wonder if there’ll be a few pastry chefs forced to make main entrees every now and again, like on regular top chef. either way, i totally wish i was there for their restaurant wars.

FABIO: A CATERED AFFAIR
in yet other top chef spinoff news, top chef season 5 finalist fabio viviani will star in his own bravo reality show called fabio: a catered affair. the show will follow fabio and his business partner jacopo falleni as they “look to expand their restaurant and catering business.” think of it as cake boss only less stereotypical italian and more, well, okay.. who are we kidding? it probably won’t be less stereotypical italian.

PROJECT RUNWAY
things don’t seem to be going so well for lifetime. after stealing project runway away from bravo, the ratings are super down. and guess what? seems bravo is having the best ratings ever. i love it!

THE UNTITLED CHRISTIAN SIRIANO SERIES
project runway’s biggest breakout star, christian siriano, has signed on to star in his own bravo series. the show will follow siriano as he sets up shop and woks on his fashion line. expect plenty of “fierces” and “trannys” and finger snaps. i’m guessing it’ll be as annoying as the rachel zoe project and million dollar listing but just as addicting.

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW YORK CITY
terrible news. just awful. like… heartbreakingly awful news. bethenny frankel and jill zarin have totally broken up. jill is now best friends forever with kelly bensimon. it’s a kell-alamity.

LET’S TALK ABOUT PEP
the newest celebreality show from vh1 focuses solely on salt n’ pepa’s pepa. the show will follow pep and her three other single friends in a “pep in the city” sort of journey. they’ll searching for love. they’ll bitch about relationships. essentially, it’s four sassy black women and i’m totally in.

FOR THE LOVE OF RAY J
there was really nowhere else to put this, so lets just state it for the record: ray j is not danger’s baby daddy.

SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE
paula abdul still hasn’t responded on whether she plans on joining the judging panel of so you think you can dance. but she certainly knows how to play the game.

STILL STANDING
i totally missed that monica has a new show on bet called still standing. but i probably don’t need to rush to see it because the “angel of mine” singer’s docudrama isn’t getting terribly great praise. has anyone out there seen it? i have to kind of love that both brandy and monica are both on reality shows (brandy shows up on ray j of love). what – did dancing with the stars really never call?